The Cold Hard Light of Day
by newbienovice
Summary: Kurt didn't know how long it had been since those thugs had dragged Jane by her hair out of the brightly lit room that he had awoken in. All he knew, was the longer she was gone, the more panicked he felt.
1. Chapter 1

Kurt didn't know how long it had been since those thugs had dragged Jane by her hair out of the brightly lit room that he had awoken in. All he knew, was the longer she was gone, the more panicked he felt.

Their undercover mission had gone so incredibly wrong. He tried to put his confused thoughts together but the throbbing in his head was not helping. He remembered being at the office discussing their mission with Nas and Jane. He remembered thinking that the last thing he wanted to do was go undercover with Jane. He didn't trust her after the events of the last few months but Nas had convinced them both that it had to be done. He had taken Nas aside into his office and pleaded his case. He hadn't felt comfortable relying on just Jane in an undercover situation. There was no trust left between the two of them and he hazarded a guess that Jane didn't want to join him on the mission either. Nas had hammered her points home and responded to him with reason and logic. Before he knew it he had found himself begrudgingly riding in the car with Jane to the old warehouse where they were to meet their mark. The silence in the car had been palpable. He had sat there tapping his hand on the window sill hoping that they could get this over and done with quickly so he could return to his current working relationship with Jane which consisted of barely acknowledging her presence and maintaining a manner of indifference.

He remembered once they had arrived at the warehouse he had taken Janes hand and walking with her down the flight of stairs behind their mark. After that, he figures that's where something went wrong because now he had found himself waking up in this bright white room with a headache from hell.

Kurt struggled to turn his head and focus his blurry eyes on the noise that had woken him. His mind slammed back into the here and now when he saw four armed men dragging Jane by her hair out of the room. He pulled his body up into a standing position, "Jane, everything is going to be okay. Jane!" Jane managed to twist her body so that she could glance at Kurt with confusion. "Weller?" Kurt moved forward, not thinking logically about how he was going to take down four armed men but before he could do anything the door was slammed shut in his face and Jane was gone. Breathing heavily, Kurt paced the tiny room racking his brain to come up with a plan while he waited for Jane to be returned.

Kurt spent what seemed like hours inspecting each crevice, corner and crack of that room looking for any way to escape. Whoever had captured them had made sure that there was no chance of escape. He surmised that they were being held in a cold room that was currently not switched on. The only escape point was the door that Jane had been dragged out of or a small vent in the ceiling. The longer that Jane was gone the more panicked he began to feel. Regardless of their current icy working relationship he was worried about her and cared about her safety. He leant his head against the cool wall and tried to formulate a plan.

Kurt eyes darted open at the sound of the door being unlocked. He braced himself, steadying his breathing and waited to see who would step into the room. Kurt audibly gasped in shock when two men pushed Jane into the room. Her head was lowered, her hair covering her face, her shoulders were hunched over and she was wearing nothing but a torn camisole and a skirt that was barely covering her thighs. Kurt's eyes immediately roamed over Jane's body assessing her injuries. Dark welts were already forming on her arms, blood was matted in her hair and there were obvious rope burns on her wrists and ankles. Kurt's knees went weak at the sight of blood trailing down Jane's inner thighs. He blindly reached for the wall to hold himself upright, doubling over to catch his breath. _What have they done to her?_

Jane didn't move from the spot where the men had left her. She was visibly shaking but not uttering a sound. Kurt slowly walked towards her with shaky steps. "Jane." There was no reaction to his voice. "Jane, are you okay?" Kurt reached and lightly rested his hand on her shoulder. Jane flinched and took a step backwards until she was pressing her body against the wall. Kurt swore under his breath. He stepped forward again and tilted her chin upwards so he could look into her eyes. Kurt's stomach dropped when he saw the pure fear that was pooling in Jane's eyes. Blood was trickling down the side of her face from a large cut over her eye but it was her wide open fearful eyes that twisted his heart.

"Weller, I'm fine." Jane managed to choke out of her tightly pressed lips. Kurt shook his head in dismay. There was no way in hell she was fine. He reached to pull Jane forward into his arms but immediately stilled his hands when he felt her trembling intensify. "Please don't touch me" whimpered Jane. Kurt slipped his jacket off his shoulders and held it out at arms length. "Will you put this on then Jane? We need to keep you warm as I think you're in shock." Jane quietly reached for his jacket and slipped it on, tugging it across her body as tightly as possible. Kurt tried to ignore the small droplets of blood that were forming at Jane's feet.

"Jane do you want to tell me what happened?" Jane's body shook even harder, she hunched her shoulders and pressed closer to the wall. Kurt tried to remain calm and non-threatening. "That's okay Jane. We don't have to talk right now." He figured that he was probably the last person she wanted to talk to. He hadn't been very open or approachable these last few months but as soon as they got out of here she would have to talk to Dr Borden or a female therapist if need be. She needed to talk to someone.

Kurt reached into his pant pocket and pulled out a clean handkerchief and handed it to Jane. "Here, you can use this if you want to clean yourself up a bit." Jane reached out a trembling hand and took the handkerchief and slowly started dabbing at the blood that was trickling down her face and arms. Kurt turned away to give Jane some privacy to tend to the blood that had finally ceased flowing down her inner thighs.

When Jane had finished cleaning off as much blood as she could, she scrunched up the handkerchief and placed it in the pocket of the jacket. "Jane, the team will know that the mission didn't go well and they will come and get us. We just need to wait for them to come." Jane slowly nodded her head and shakily lowered herself onto the floor. She dragged her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around her legs. She lowered her head into her knees and quietly wept, not caring that Kurt could hear her.

Kurt sat carefully next to Jane, not venturing too close in case he scared her. He hoped the team wouldn't be too much longer as he was out of his depth here. He didn't know how to help Jane through this. He was trying to keep as calm as possible but when his mind strayed to think about what had happened to Jane he could feel his anxiety levels rising and adrenalin shooting through this body. If he got his hands on those four men … It was the whirring sound of the compressor that pulled him from his vengeful thoughts. Startled he looked to the ceiling and felt the first gust of cold air through the vent above. Someone had turned the compressor on that serviced the coldroom.


	2. Chapter 2

Kurt glanced over at Jane and saw that had not moved from her foetal position. Her face was still buried in her scrunched up knees. His hands itched to pull her into his arms but he knew she wouldn't feel comfort from such a touch—not now. He resigned himself to sit quietly and patiently for the team to arrive.

The temperature in the room had dropped quickly, he could feel his body shivering with cold. Jane was trembling and shaking and curled even tighter, making herself as small as possible. "Jane, why don't you move closer so we can share some body warmth?" Jane shook her head and continue to shake and shiver. Kurt rubbed his hands together back and forth to try and generate some warmth. A misty fog was visible with each breath he took. He was cold like he had never experienced before but his concern was for Jane. She had a flimsy torn short skirt on and his jacket. He could see her legs had turned s horrible shade of pale blue. Kurt knelt on his knees and crawled closer to Jane, sitting on his heels in front of her. "Jane your legs are really cold. Can you feel them properly?" Jane looked up at Kurt, her lips blue and trembling. "They're okay Kurt. I'm fine."

There it was again. 'Fine' are you shitting me! "Jane I'm going to rub your legs a bit to see if I can get the circulation flowing okay." Jane nodded and slowly stretched her legs out. Kurt gently laid his hands on Janes right leg and rubbed firmly and quickly up her calf muscle. Jane ripped her leg away, folding it back up to her chest and ground out through gritted teeth "Don't touch me." Kurt sighed, "Jane you know I'm just trying to get the blood circulating. That's all. Please let me do this." Jane vehemently shook her head, tears spilling from the corner of her eyes and whispered in a shaky voice, "I don't want to be touched." Kurt palmed the back of his neck, he was frustrated that she wouldn't let him warm her up but he understood her reaction. Kurt stood up and lowered his slacks, standing in his boxer shorts he passed his pants to Jane, "Will you at least put these on then?" Jane looked up at Kurt through her teary eyes, "Weller you need them. You're cold too." Weller shook his head, "No Jane, you need them more than me. Put them on." He tried to not make his request sound like a command but he was adamant that she needed to put them on.

After Jane had slipped on his slacks Kurt sat back down against the wall beside Jane and tried to think of warm cosy thoughts. His body was involuntarily shaking from the ever decreasing temperature in the room. Kurt could hear Janes teeth chattering uncontrollably. He knew that he needed to formulate a plan because it wouldn't take too much longer before hypothermia would set in.

Jane's head was whirling with thoughts. She pushed her head further into her knees to try and escape the chilly air. She tried not to think about what had happened when she was dragged out of the room away from Kurt. She felt dirty and disgusted. Her arms ached from where they had tied her to the table. She had fought hard but there were too many rough hands holding her body in place. The punch to the right side of her face had been a welcome distraction from the physical onslaught she had experienced while strapped to the table. She had tried to escape inside her head and it was only when she heard Kurt calling her name that she realized it was finally over and she was back in the room.

Sitting here now, curled into a right ball Jane was ashamed and humiliated that Kurt knew what had happened to her. It was the first time in months that she had seen such concern in his eyes but it was the pity that she saw swimming in his eyes that upset her the most. She didn't need his pity. She didn't need it when he found out about her time at the CIA and she didn't need it now. She would get through this herself, she had proven she didn't need to rely on anyone, especially not Kurt.

Jane's teeth were chattering so hard she was beginning to think she may chip a tooth. The air was bone chilling cold and the jacket and pants weren't doing much to protect her thin body from the freezing air. She could feel herself getting tired and she desperately wanted to doze off but her trembling body kept her awake. Kurt noticed that Jane was drifting in and out of sleep. He needed to keep her awake and warm. He slid over closer to her, "Jane, we really need to use each other's body warmth to get through this. I'm going to pull you closer to me okay." Jane didn't respond, so Kurt slowly wound his arm around Janes back until he heard Janes tormented voice, "Weller I'm sorry, but I just can't ... Please don't. Just let me sleep." Kurt bit his lip to stop the frustrated sigh leaving his mouth. "Jane I understand that, but we will not make it through this if we don't work together. It's just about warmth, nothing else."

Logically Jane knew what Kurt was saying was right but her body wouldn't obey her brain. She couldn't bare to have anyone touch her already abused body. She would rather curl up and die then have to face anything like that again. Kurt watched Jane closely, he saw the tremor running through her body and wondered if it was just the cold or fear of him being close to her. He had to find a way to get her to come closer to him because the jacket and pants weren't enough to keep her warm. There was also the issue that he himself was beginning to feel the effects of the cold air. "Jane what about if I turn around and you move closer to me, that way you are in control and you know my hands are in front of me?" Kurt tried to keep the urgency out of his voice. "Jane you know that I would never do anything to hurt you. I am trying to keep us both alive."

Jane slowly lifted her head from her knees. Her eyes brimming with tears and whispered in a shaky voice, "I can't Kurt. I just can't do it." And she lowered her head back down and quietly wept. Kurt's heart tightened in his chest. He realized that Jane was so traumatized that even in this situation she couldn't bring herself to be near him. He gritted his teeth when he thought about what those thugs had done to her. He hated doing this but he thought he may have a way to make Jane come closer to him. He was worried about how blue and pale she looked and figured it was his only option. He knew that she was a selfless person who would do anything for those that she cared about, he just hoped that she still cared enough about him.

He spoke quietly and tried to keep the guilt from his voice, "Jane I know right now you feel like you have nothing to live for and I know you've experienced something incredibly traumatic today but I need your help. We won't make it if we don't work together. I want to survive this. I have to survive this. I have a baby on the way and a nephew and sister who are expecting me to come home tonight. I need you to do this Jane, can you do it for me if you won't do it for yourself?" Kurt held his breath in anticipation, he hoped that was enough to change her mind.

Jane squeezed her eyes shut tight. She heard the pleading in Kurt's voice and knew what had to be done. She could get through this one last thing. She gradually lifted her head and uncurled her legs. "Okay." Kurt let out the breath he was holding and quickly turned his body away from Jane. "Why don't you scoot behind me and push up against my back. I promise I won't touch you with my hands Jane. I'm just going to sit here quietly."

Jane took a deep breath and slid clothed to Kurts back. She bent her knees so they mirrored his and pushed herself closer. She opened the jacket and tentatively leant her bruised chest against his back, just barely touching him. She tried in vain to control the tremor that shook her body when she leant in closer. She grabbed the edge of the jacket and pulled it around Kurts side and held it in place with her hand against his chest. She froze in place, not wanting to move closer but fearing moving away.

Kurt kept his body as still as possible. His heart broke at the tentative touches of Jane's hand on his chest and the light pressure on his back. He had to restrain himself from pushing back into her body to close the gap. "Are you doing okay Jane?" Kurt asked quietly. Jane nodded into his back and pressed the jacket to his chest s little tighter.

Jane used every bit of her willpower to stay leaning lightly against Kirts back with her arm tentatively tucked around his side holding the jacket to his chest. The heat radiating from his back was warming her body slowly but her teeth were still noisily chattering and her body was trembling. She noticed with concern that Kurt had started to visibly tremble as well. She sat with her eyes shut hoping that the team would arrive before it was too late.

Kurt startled when he heard the lock on the door click open. He felt Jane tense behind him immediately. The relief flowed through his chilled body when he recognized Reade's voice, "You taking a little nap in here Weller?" Kurt snorted and felt Jane move back away from him, the cold air immediately creeping along his bare back. "Get us out of here Reade." Kurt mumbled through his chattering teeth.

Sitting on the bumper of the ambulance with a foil blanket wrapped around him and the warm sun shining down on them Kurt was immensely grateful to his team. If he was honest he didn't know how much longer Jane's body or his could have coped with being held captive in the coolroom. He glanced over to Jane to see her similarly wrapped in a foil blanket, her stare blank, but the color returning to her legs and lips. He walked slowly over to her, "You doing okay Jane? I think you should go with the ambulance and get a full check up considering ..." Jane quickly interrupted Kurt before he could continue "I will Weller but please can we keep what happened between us? No report. No discussions. It's personal and I don't want everyone knowing." Kurt bent down so that he was looking directly into Jane's frightened eyes, "Jane. I can't do that. I have to ..." Jane pleaded tearfully, "Please Weller, can you just do this one last thing for me? Please." Kurt shook his head and lowered his voice, "Jane you have nothing to be ashamed of. It wasn't your fault." Much to Jane's dismay her breath hitched and tears escaped her eyes, "Please Kurt. Please do this for me." Kurt scrubbed his face with his hands and sighed. "Okay, I will leave it out of the report on one condition, you have to talk to a therapist about it. It doesn't have to be Dr Borden but you must talk to someone." Jane nodded silently and pulled the blanket around her closer. "I will. I promise. Thank you Kurt." Kurt wasn't happy with his decision but really he couldn't bare to put Jane through any more trauma than what she had already experienced. Once again he bent down in front of her, "Jane, I'm needed back at the office and as much as I don't want to leave you here I have to go. You make sure you get checked out okay." Jane gave Kurt a weary smile and nodded her understanding.

As Kurt walked away Jane breathed a sigh of relief that their ordeal was over and that he wasn't going to make an official record of what had happened to her. She felt a tinge of disappointment that Kurt had so quickly walked to his car and left with the team, leaving her with the paramedics. She supposed she couldn't expect more really but nonetheless, she felt a little perturbed by his lack of concern. Her thoughts were interrupted by the paramedics explaining that her body temperature was back to normal levels. When they asked her if she would like to accompany them to the hospital to receive a thorough checkup she immediately shook her head. She couldn't bare more prodding and poking. All she wanted to do was escape to the safe house and crawl into bed. She knew that she should get an internal examination considering the amount of blood loss she had experienced but the fear of more invasive procedures had her resisting common sense. The paramedics were unaware of what she had endured and she wasn't about to explain it to them. She gingerly rose from the ambulance footstep and expressed her gratitude. "No, I'm fine thanks. I will just head home and rest." The paramedics merely nodded and commenced packing up their equipment to leave.

After a cleansing shower Jane walking wearily to her bedroom wrapped in a towel. She was too tired and mentally exhausted to do much more than crawl under the covers and fall fast asleep. It was the thumping on the door that broke her out of a sweat induced slumber. Breathing heavily Jane lurched forward in the bed disorientated. The thumping on the door continued but Jane had no wish to answer the door or leave the bed. Her muscles were aching, her face was throbbing and there was a deep ache in her groin. She carefully lay back in the bed pulling the sheet right around her and hope that the incessant knocking on the door would stop.

Kurt scrambled for his key to Jane's safe house. It had been a long time since he had used her spare key, too long really. He realized he should have made more of an effort to check up on her since she had returned from the CIA but there wasn't time to dwell on that now. He'd been knocking on the door for at least five minutes and Jane hadn't answered. He knew she wasn't at the hospital as he had already rung to check. He would have thought they would have kept her in the hospital at least overnight but they must have assessed that she was okay to head home.

He quietly clicked the door open listening for any noise. It was only 8pm so he was a little surprised not to find Jane downstairs watching TV or relaxing on the couch. He hesitated to walk upstairs but he knew if he didn't check on her he wouldn't get to sleep himself tonight. He just needed to know she was okay and then he would head home.

He walked up the stairs two at a time and stood hesitantly outside her bedroom door. He knocked quietly and slowly swung the door open. "Jane?" The room was dark with just a slim streak of light shining through the closed bedroom curtains. He ventured forward again saying Jane's name a little louder. His gaze moved to the bed but he couldn't see a figure laying on it on the dim shadows. He reached and flicked on the lights and froze in shock. Jane cowering in the corner behind the dresser wearing just a towel with the lamp in her hand as a weapon. "Jane, it's just me, Kurt." He slowly walked towards her with his palm face up to appear non-threatening. "Jane, you're safe. It's me, Kurt." As he came closer he could see she was trembling in fear. When her eyes met his she slowly released the lamp and let it clutter to the floor. Kurt moved forward and made to help her to her feet but Janes trembling voice made him pause midstep, "Please don't come any closer."

Jane felt trapped and vulnerable standing there naked with just a towel wrapped around her battered body. Every muscle and tendon was screaming for her to lay down. She knew that Kurt wasn't here to harm her but she couldn't help her first instinct which was to fear anyone encroaching on her personal space. She realized she was more messed up than what she thought but she just needed time to process everything. "I'm sorry Kurt. I know you're here to check on me, I just ... I just feel ..." Kurt nodded quietly and took a few steps back. "It's okay Jane, I understand. Why don't you hop back into bed and I will go make us a cup of tea." Jane nodded her head and tentatively moved toward the bed. She didn't have the energy to slip on some clothes so instead she climbed under the covers and pulled them up high to her armpits and leant against the headboard and waited for Kurt to return.

Kurt ambled back into the bedroom with two cups of steaming tea. He gave Jane her cup and then gingerly perched himself on the side of her bed near her feet. "How did you go this afternoon Jane? I'm sorry I had to leave you." Jane shrugged her shoulders and murmured that she was fine. "I just need some rest." They both sat quietly sipping their hot tea unsure of what to say next. It was awkward for Jane to have Kurt back in her house let alone sitting on the side of her bed. It had been so long since they'd even had a conversation that wasn't solely about work.

"Weller, I'm sorry about the way I keep behaving with you. I think it's just a temporary side effect from what those guys did to me. It's not about you." Kurt nodded, "Do you want to talk about what happened Jane?" He really didn't want to talk about it. He didn't want to picture in his mind what she went through while he was passed out cold in that room. Just picturing her standing there in the room afterwards made his heart break for her.

Jane looked up at him with teary eyes, "I don't really want to talk about it. I just want to forget that it happened and move on." Kurt gently laid his hand on Jane's lower leg in an effort to let her know he understood but he instantly felt her flinch and move her leg away. "Jane, I meant what I said though, you need to talk to a therapist about this. I can't presume to know how you feel but what I do know is that as much as you want to forget, you need to talk it through with someone that can help you process it." Jane sighed quietly, "I know Weller and I will."

Kurt wasn't sure how to ask about her physical injuries but he felt it was important to broach the subject with her. "Jane did the doctors say that you are going to be okay physically from the assault? Is everything okay?" Janes faced burned with embarrassment that they were talking about something that was so private but also she felt a little shamefaced that she hadn't had a thorough checkup even though she had told him she would. She didn't want to lie to him so instead she quietly murmured, "I will be fine." Kurt breathed a sigh of relief but he knew that whilst the physical injuries would heal it was the emotional injuries that were of concern.

"Okay, I better get going Jane. I just wanted to check in on you. See you in the morning." Jane gave Kurt a wavering smile and waited for him to leave the room. She doubted she would get anymore sleep tonight but her body was so sore that she thought she might just lie in bed until it was time for work again.

A few weeks passed since the incident. Janes injuries had healed and she had spent some time with a therapist discussing what had occurred which she felt was helping a little. She still found herself quickly stepping backwards whenever an agent came to close to her or flinching involuntarily if someone innocently touched her. She knew that she had to get control of her reactions as people were starting to look at her oddly.

Just yesterday she was leaning over her desk doodling on a piece of paper when Reade tapped her on the shoulder. She felt her fingers clutch the pen tighter and had to control her instantaneous reaction which was to plunge the pen into his hand. Reade noticed her aggressive reaction and took a quick step back which allowed Jane to quickly jump up from the chair and head to the locker room. Breathing heavily she leaned against the locker room wall until she felt steady enough to walk quietly back to her desk.

Kurt had kept his distance from Jane over the weeks but he was concerned about her wellbeing. He noticed the many times that Jane would flinch or step backwards when her personal space was invaded and although it found it incredibly concerning he was glad to realize that it wasn't just him personally that Jane had such a negative reaction to. He realized it was a side effect of the trauma she had experienced and he hoped with time that things would settle down and she would begin to feel comfortable and safe around them again.

He was also concerned about Jane's physical health, her arms were thinner, her wrists noticeably smaller and her clothes hung looser on her body. He had noticed that in the past week Jane would make regular trips to the bathroom and come back into the office looking a little pale. He knew he had to pull her aside and check in with her, something in his gut was telling him that something wasn't quite right.

It was that afternoon that he found the opportunity when Jane was the last one to leave the office. He quickly walked towards her, ensuring he didn't encroach on her self imposed personal space and firmly said, "I'm going to give you a lift home tonight Jane. We need to talk." Jane looked up at Kurt in shock, she didn't respond but simply gathered up her things and followed him to the lift.

Jane hesitantly climbed into the car, she didn't know what Kurt wanted to discuss but she figured whatever it was it wasn't going to be good. She tried to ignore the queasiness in her belly. She had been sick for the past few days and for some reason she just couldn't shake it. She certainly wasn't in the mood for an in depth discussion. Unusually by the time their long days were over she would just crawl into bed and sleep til the morning.

Kurt tapped the steering wheel of the car impatiently waiting for Jane to buckle her seatbelt. He glanced over and noticed her pale face and noticebly thin arms. "Jane, I've noticed you've been dashing off to the rest rooms a lot lately. You are also looking decidedly pale. Are you feeling sick?" Jane shrugged her shoulders. "I've just had this stomach bug that won't go away. It seems to be worse in the morning but I've always got a queasy feeling. I figure I should be better in a few days, there's nothing to worry about." Jane appreciated that he was actually concerned for her but he needn't worry about her, she could look after herself.

Kurts mind was running a mile a minute due to the information Jane had just shared. "Jane, have you been seeing anyone lately?" He stammered a little and hesitantly added, "I mean have you been dating anyone?" Jane fidgeted nervously in her seat. Why on earth would Kurt be asking her something so personal. He didn't need to know the extent of her love life and she certainly didn't want to know about his. After all this time it still hurt knowing that he was dating Nas. "Weller it's not really any of your business but no, I've had enough to focus on without dating someone." She paused for a moment not sure whether she should share her last thought, "Besides, it's a little hard to be intimate with someone when I've got your name stamped across my back."

Kurt gripped the steering wheel tighter and quickly pulled over onto the side of the road. Jane looked over at Kurt in surprise, "Weller, what are you doing?" Kurt switched off the engine and turned himself around in the seat so he could look directly at Jane, "Jane, did you get a full check up at the hospital after we were locked in that cold room like you said you would?"

Jane moved around in her seat so she could glance out the side window. She had promised herself she would never lie to him but she knew he would be angry when she told him the truth. Kurt tentatively reached out and touched Janes arm to direct her attention back to him. Jane flinched and pulled her arm away, pushing herself as close to the door as possible. "Jane I'm sorry, it's really important that you tell me the truth about this." Kurt's stomach was clenching tightly and his heartbeat was accelerating with every second that she did not answer.

Jane slowly turned around in her seat to face Kurt and quietly replied, "I couldn't bare the thought of the doctors prodding and poking me so I didn't get checked out. I went home and showered and went to bed. I just couldn't do it Kurt. I felt used and dirty. I just needed to go home and forget that it ever happened." Jane bent her head into her hands trying to quell the tears forming in her tired eyes.

Kurt tried to keep the anger and frustration out of his voice, "You should have told me Jane. I would have come with you. You should have told me god damn it." Jane began to weep in earnest following his outburst. "I'm sorry Kurt. I'm sorry. It doesn't matter, I'm okay now."

Kurt leant his head back in the seat and tried to calm himself down. What the hell were they going to do now? Jane has no idea of the position she's in and if his hunch was right, she was far from okay. He palmed the back of his neck in frustration and slowly formulated a plan in his head. The first step was to find out if his assumption was correct. He took out his phone and looked for the nearest pharmacy. "Jane, it's going to be okay."

Kurt figured it would be best if he didn't share his concerns with Jane until they reached her safe house. He had pulled into the pharmacy and nochantly mentioned he had to grab something for Sara, leaving her in the car. He hurriedly asked the pharmacist to package up his purchase and returned to the car with Jane none the wiser. He found her leaning against the car window staring blankly at the parking lot.

Once they reached her safe house Jane sat quietly on the couch watching Kurt pace the room with a brown paper bag in his hands. Jane wasn't sure what was going on but surely he knew that even though she didn't get checked up like she had promised she was okay now. She had healed well and she was making progress with the therapist. Jane needed to try and calm Kurt down. "Kurt I'm okay now. Apart from this stomach bug I am feeling okay. There's no permanent damage from that day. I'm sorry I didn't do what you asked of me but I hope you can understand why."

Kurt turned and faced Jane, he looked into her concerned face, took a deep breath and began, "Jane, I don't want to alarm you but I don't think you have a stomach bug. I need you to take a pregnancy test." Jane's stomach lurched in response to Kurt's statement. She could feel beads of sweat forming along her neckline and her mouth was dry, she pulled herself to a standing position and clumsily staggered towards the bathroom falling to her knees at the foot of the toilet. She involuntarily emptied her stomach contents into the toilet bowl and laid her pounding head on the cool tile floor.

Kurt raced after Jane, concern etched in his face. He knew he had shocked her but he didn't know how else to tell her. He knelt down beside her, careful not to touch her, "Jane, I'm sorry but I don't think we should panic just yet, we don't know anything for certain until you take a test." Jane slowly lifted her head from the floor and leant back against the tiled wall. Kurt could see the fear in Jane's eyes. He stopped himself from pulling her into his arms and instead handed her a box from the brown paper bag. "Jane, read the instructions on this test. I will give you some privacy for a bit. Let's not panic yet."

Jane nodded and carefully stood up. Kurt was right, there was no need to panic yet. She would do this damn test and then she could go to bed. Kurt left the bathroom, quietly closing the door. His heart was beating erratically. Deep down he knew want the result would say but there was a small bit of hope that he was wrong. He waited patiently outside the door for Jane to finish. He didn't dare think about what would happen if it was positive.

Jane opened the bathroom door holding the pregnancy test in her hand. "It says I have to wait three minutes for the results. Two lines means it's positive, one means negative." Kurt nodded. He was familiar with how the test worked as he had been with Sarah when she found out she was pregnant, although that was more of a happier occasion and Sarah had hoped for two lines. Jane placed the test on the kitchen counter and stood there with her arms folded silently waiting.

Kurts breath hitched when he saw the second faint pink line forming on the test. His eyes darted to Jane. "Oh god, oh god no," whaled Jane. Her whole body was shaking in shock. She clutched the kitchen counter to steady her weak knees. "I'm pregnant." Jane couldn't contain her anguish any longer, she let out a gut wrenching sob and folded herself into the floor. Kurt moved forward his heart hammering in his chest and placed his hand on Janes back. Jane flinched backwards but he maintained a light pressure and began rubbing small comforting circles murmuring, "It's going to be okay Jane. It will be okay." He didn't tell her that he didn't know how it was going to be okay but he needed to offer some comfort. He couldn't bear the heartbreak that was evident in her sobbing body. He carefully pulled her to feet and helped her settle on the couch. Kurt knelt in front of her, smoothing her hair away from her face, "Jane whatever you decide you're not in this alone. It's my fault. I should have gone with you to the hospital. I should have helped you that day. I'm so sorry."

Janes couldn't think straight. I'm pregnant! Just the thought had her gasping for air. How could this have happened. She had just wanted to forget that day ever happened and now she would have a reminder for the rest of her life. A baby! I'm having a baby. I can't be a mother. Jane was working herself up, her body was shaking and she couldn't breathe properly. Her breaths were coming in short sharp gasps, she was clutching at her shirt front. Kurt could see this that Jane was fighting for each breath. "Jane, I need you to calm down for me. Take a deep breath in nice and slowly." Jane tried to focus on Kurt's voice and took a long steadying breath. Kurt smoothed her hair away from her face again and gently wiped at her tears. "That's right, big deep breaths." It took some minutes but eventually Jane's breathing returned to normal. She jumped back on the couch when she became aware that Kurt's hands were massing the length of her neck.

Kurt leant back on his heels and closely watched Jane. He knew that her reaction to him wasn't personal, that it was a self preservation instinct but each time she flinched or moved away from he felt a sense of disappointment and loss. To know that she couldn't bear him touching her wasn't something he wanted to focus on.

"Jane, I'm going to make you a doctors appointment for first thing in the morning." Jane nodded and fidgeted with her hands in her lap. She could feel her anxiety escalating again but she tried to remain calm. "Kurt please don't tell anyone yet. I don't want to have to face the questions that I don't have answers to. I don't even know who the father ...oh god he's a monster. My baby's father is a monster..." Jane buried her head in her hands and wept loudly. "Kurt what am I going to do?"


End file.
